LIMITED PRECIOUSNESS — satsuki shibuya . journal

"Life is but an instant. "

We hear this constantly, but it doesn't seem to sink in until we are about to take our very last breath.

Why is this the case?  

It is because we do not believe that our time here is limited. If we were to truly believe this with our heart, soul and spirit, many of the things we ponder about would not be such an issue.

This coming November 22nd marks three full years since I became sick. I, too, believed that I was invincible. Invincible in the sense that the things I chose to partake in as my priorities were not based on my limited time here, but as if I was going to live for eternity.

These past three years have been the most difficult yet most enlightening years if my life. On the outside, it might seem like there hasn't been much change, but internally, I feel like a completely different person. Actually, I finally feel like myself.

I recently read in an article that when we pass away, our spirit bodies are completely stripped of any burdens, negative thoughts, wounds that we may carry and instantly feel the most connected with our true self than we have ever felt during our lifetime. Whether this is true or not is dependant on each individual's beliefs, but the interesting part of the article was where it stated that one would feel the most themselves than they have ever felt because of all that is stripped off of them.  

If one were to think about it, you realize that what is blocking us from truly being ourselves, connected to our spirits, is many times due to outside influences, skewed thoughts and societal expectations. If we were to strip all those things, we would be able to see ourselves for who we truly are as clear as day. 

This is something that I've been experiencing since becoming sick. I've actually been dealing with health issues for most of my life, but have finally realized why this is and it is because I haven't been seeing myself for who I truly am. Some may call it spirit, heart, being, but in essence, the true self. 

I've heard and read about this concept before, but never truly understood what it meant until now. By connecting with this truth, I finally feel like I'm living. I can now see clearly what my life purpose is. I can feel the energy of the flowers that bloom, the wind that sings, the earth that breathes. Why is this possible? Because at the end of the day, we are all one. Humans, plants, animals, inanimate objects... we are all one.

And this brings me back to my first thought of life being limited and because it is limited, each of our existence is precious. Therefore, it is imparative that we find, in each of us, our true calling, to connect with our universal source within so that we can illuminate our spirits in the most beautiful light for when the day comes that we must pass on, we can look back and know that the life lived was lived fully in each moment.